Black & White

We say we want love; loyalty and somebody to mold our bodies around. The moment we reserve, receive and return those emotions. We get scared. We run away. It's scary being loved; it's scary being loved the way we deserved to be love. We are haunted by old thoughts, emotions and our old us. We are afraid to make mistakes that we never learned from. When love feels right; we dive in before even knowing how to swim. We love even though we know the receptionist will throw our letters away. We love unconditionally; we love so much we forget how to function ourselves. We love to the point where we'd rip off the clothes off our backs to keep others warm. We love then we get depressed when the other person doesn't view, hear or feel us the same... I wish I can see myself the way you and the world see me. I wish I see how good I can be, how good I am. But I don't. All I see is love and happiness. May it be a thing or person. It feels as if I'm in a tunnel and that is my destination and light. You're my person. You always have been. We're young. We barely know each other. I'm an open book. Ask me anything, I'll tell you honestly. I'll always be honest and blunt with you. You have no idea how many thoughts crosses my mind when I think of you. I pray for your safety and your return. We're not even in the same wavelength. We live in two operate worlds. Yet it didn't change how I feel about you since day 1. You're my person and you complete my existence. You complete my soul, my heart and mind. You completely my unsaved universe. I wish you would see me the way I see you. I have more I want to tell you and show you. I want you to myself. All the time. I want to love you in ways you haven't even experienced. I want you and all of you. I want to pinpoint your flaws and fall in love with it anyways. I want to love you from your head to your toes. I didn't know it was possible to feel this way. I have things I need to heal from. Things I haven't completely healed from. I don't want anyone else to love you. I'm so selfish when it comes to you. Does that make me a bad person? That I want to show you off to the world but keep you to myself? You are my entire world. All I see is you. I was happy for awhile. I always have been for awhile now. But you are the cherry on top. You make me very happy and I look forward to hearing from you. You give me butterflies every time I talk to you. You make me feel more alive than being alive itself. The feelings are truly indescribable. I want to love you like the 90s. I want to write you hand-written letters. I want to make you your own CDs of our favorite love songs. Then CDs I'd make love to you too. I want to hold your hand as if it was still illegal to. I want to kiss you and scare the world. Love has no limits or color. I want to love you so unconditionally that I will be your savior and keeper. Have you ever been so in love with someone? I want to love your brown skin even when society and the world shames you for it. In my eyes you are more human than I have been. I want to kiss your body, your lips, your forehead. I want to love you more and more. I want to see how far and deep I get. Moms was wrong once again. There is love in the world. Whether from others or yourself. Love is real. Love isn't suppose to hurt or feel painful. Most days I miss you more than I love you. I get high and all I think about is how much I miss you all the time. I think of the next time I'll be able to see your face, get your texts and phone calls. I often miss you because I miss your presence. I wish there was more time in this time. The universe brought me to you. You've been missed, you're always going to be loved. No matter what circumstances comes with it. No matter what consequences. You're my soulmate, my other half. You are the ying to my yang. In my world, I see only black and white. I know right from wrong, I see only evil and good. So far you bring color to this world. To my world. I didn't know how far I have looked into the future or one with you until now. I want marriage, I want kids. I want to build and grow with you. I want assets, I want a life with you. Publish

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